Weird.
I just realized that I need to change my profile information for this site; it says I'm a new mom. I'm still a mom, but with my life with Simon approaching the 2-year mark, I'm not exactly "new" anymore.
And that's a good thing. Mommies aren't like cars; we don't instantly depreciate the moment you drive us off the lot. I'd say that a Mommy is like a fine wine (just in case that simile hasn't been overused enough lately), but that's not right, either; a fine wine might improve with age, but you can't enjoy it in the meantime. Being a Mommy means being necessary, useful, indispensable from the very beginning.
As ready as I thought I was for my Baby Boy to be born after a long almost-nine-months of pregnancy, I wasn't ready. Fortunately, a newborn doesn't need much from its mom except love and the sheer tenacity to bumble through until her exhausted brain treks up that steep learning curve, gaining experience as she goes. I loved Simon before I ever saw him, but damned if I knew how to give him a sponge bath. Still, I was the best Mommy I could be, and that was good enough for him.
Now? Well, I got the sponge bath thing down just in time for him to switch to the tub; now I have the challenge of keeping an excited, squealing toddler from running around in the "big people" tub. I'm more confident that I was when we started, and waaaaay more experienced. I've survived poops that would turn an elephant-keeper's stomach and smiled through snotty kisses. I've cried over a boy who's growing up way too fast for my liking, even as I cheered on his first steps and marvelled at the brilliance of his first words.
I might have all that experience under my belt, but when you're a parent, the stuff you learned yesterday doesn't necessarily translate to tomorrow's problems. I know so much about Baby Simon, and I'm quickly learning about Toddler Simon, but Little Boy Simon? I can't imagine.
I'm not a new mommy anymore- and I'm glad. I was happy as a new mom, but I'm definitely more relaxed now. I've started to get back to having my own life (even though Simon is part of everything I do). I'm more competent and confident as a Mommy than I was 20-plus months ago.
And that's all I've got. I'm not going to conclude this ramble by saying that I'm a better mom, because I don't know that. I've always been the best one I could be, and I think that it's been pretty good so far. Being a parent isn't like a car; it's not like wine, and it's not like a career where you get promotions for gaining experience. It's like... beng a parent. New or used, we're all just doing the best we can, trying to keep up with the amazing little critters we're mommying or daddying for as long as we've got 'em.
OK, I'm going to change that profile thinger now. "I'm a 26-year old used Mommy..."
Tuesday, May 15, 2007
Friday, April 27, 2007
Update
I'm taking some posts from Mommyhood Confidential and editing them, lengthening them, updating them, etc. I don't know what I'm going to do with what I end up with just yet, but I think the good posts could be better.
Any comments you could put here re: your favourite posts, editing suggestions, etc. would be greatly appreciated.
Any comments you could put here re: your favourite posts, editing suggestions, etc. would be greatly appreciated.
Negotiations
OK, ladies, let's come to order. Ladies? Gals? MOMMIES! That's better. Thanks.
Let's get this meeting started. For the written record, this is the first meeting of the proposed Mommy Union- got that, madam secretary? Wha- arrowroot biscuits in the keyboard? Just take notes be hand, then. What was I saying? Oh, meeting. We're here to discuss our position for upcoming negotiations. It's time that our situation improved, time that we were appreciated for the many jobs we do.
OK, whose phone is that? No... A marble in his nose? Yes, you may be excused.
Back to business. I'm handing out a list of proposed points for negotiation- we'll read over them, and discussion will follow.
Point 1: The pay sucks- sloppy kisses and toothless grins aside, of course. When's the last time one of us cashed a paycheque for what we do? I heard that a recent estimate put the value of a Mommy's work at over $130,000 a year. This may be a bit low- we're looking into it.
Point 2: Sick days. We don't get 'em. If anyone else in the family is sick, we're there with acetaminophen, towels and a barf-bowl. When we're out with a bug that we probably caught from the kids, though, we can't call in sick. No one fills in for us- most of the time, anyway. Even if we get to lie down, there's still the soft knock at the door; "Mommy? Mommy, will you play Candyland now? It won't make you frow up..."
Point 3: Working Hours. In the early months of our careers, work is 24/7, with no regularly scheduled lunch or coffee breaks. Even after the kids are sleeping through the night, or when they're off to school, we're on-call every hour, every day. And weekends and holidays off? Fuggedaboudit. Those are a Mommy's busy season! Point 4: Pension. Not only are we not getting paid, we also have a retirement plan that consists of crossing our fingers and praying the kids pick a decent retirement home. At this point it looks like most of us are headed for Barneyville retirement castle, but we're hoping that our prospects will improve in the future.
Point 5: Workplace safety. Yes, a babyproofed home may seem like a safe work environment, but this is true only if you ignore the regular tripping over baby-gates, burns from hot trays of chicken fingers and the inevitable regular exposure to toxic wastes we encounter while on diaper-duty.
Mommies, this is unacceptable. No one else in this country is expected to work under these conditions. Um... there is one teensy little problem, though. See, we seem to have very little of what they call leverage.What are we going to do if they don't give into our demands? Anyone willing to strike? Show of hands... See, there's the problem. Will we quit if our demands are not met, so that our families will have to bring in expensive nannies, chauffeurs, maids, personal shoppers, tutors and accountants? No, no I'm not going to do that. You? No? Right...
Well, we'll discuss this next week. You are all going to be here next week, right? Nancy? Ballet recital, eh? Oh, tell Beatrice I said break a leg. No, not really. Jane? Uh-huh, OK. Well, we'll reschedule. Um... I'll call you. As soon as we figure out where the dog buried the cordless phone.
Meeting adjourned.
Let's get this meeting started. For the written record, this is the first meeting of the proposed Mommy Union- got that, madam secretary? Wha- arrowroot biscuits in the keyboard? Just take notes be hand, then. What was I saying? Oh, meeting. We're here to discuss our position for upcoming negotiations. It's time that our situation improved, time that we were appreciated for the many jobs we do.
OK, whose phone is that? No... A marble in his nose? Yes, you may be excused.
Back to business. I'm handing out a list of proposed points for negotiation- we'll read over them, and discussion will follow.
Point 1: The pay sucks- sloppy kisses and toothless grins aside, of course. When's the last time one of us cashed a paycheque for what we do? I heard that a recent estimate put the value of a Mommy's work at over $130,000 a year. This may be a bit low- we're looking into it.
Point 2: Sick days. We don't get 'em. If anyone else in the family is sick, we're there with acetaminophen, towels and a barf-bowl. When we're out with a bug that we probably caught from the kids, though, we can't call in sick. No one fills in for us- most of the time, anyway. Even if we get to lie down, there's still the soft knock at the door; "Mommy? Mommy, will you play Candyland now? It won't make you frow up..."
Point 3: Working Hours. In the early months of our careers, work is 24/7, with no regularly scheduled lunch or coffee breaks. Even after the kids are sleeping through the night, or when they're off to school, we're on-call every hour, every day. And weekends and holidays off? Fuggedaboudit. Those are a Mommy's busy season! Point 4: Pension. Not only are we not getting paid, we also have a retirement plan that consists of crossing our fingers and praying the kids pick a decent retirement home. At this point it looks like most of us are headed for Barneyville retirement castle, but we're hoping that our prospects will improve in the future.
Point 5: Workplace safety. Yes, a babyproofed home may seem like a safe work environment, but this is true only if you ignore the regular tripping over baby-gates, burns from hot trays of chicken fingers and the inevitable regular exposure to toxic wastes we encounter while on diaper-duty.
Mommies, this is unacceptable. No one else in this country is expected to work under these conditions. Um... there is one teensy little problem, though. See, we seem to have very little of what they call leverage.What are we going to do if they don't give into our demands? Anyone willing to strike? Show of hands... See, there's the problem. Will we quit if our demands are not met, so that our families will have to bring in expensive nannies, chauffeurs, maids, personal shoppers, tutors and accountants? No, no I'm not going to do that. You? No? Right...
Well, we'll discuss this next week. You are all going to be here next week, right? Nancy? Ballet recital, eh? Oh, tell Beatrice I said break a leg. No, not really. Jane? Uh-huh, OK. Well, we'll reschedule. Um... I'll call you. As soon as we figure out where the dog buried the cordless phone.
Meeting adjourned.
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